Before I start on this post I wanna give you a quick thought on that game last night:

It was the most anticlimatic championship clincher of all time, in any sport. I was in bed watching the OT while the wife gave me some SCH (Stanley Cup Head) and all of a sudden I see Patrick Kane skating around like a retard and everyone else was standing around wondering why is Patrick Kane skating around like a retard?. I said to myself, “well I guess he scored…? Did he? Oh he did!”

Now back the this post.

Now that the Blackhawks are the Stanley Cup champeens, all the talk is about what will each player do with the cup when its their day with it. I head a lot of corney things like “Im gonna take it to my home town so the people who supported me from day 1 can see it.” BORING! Lord Stanley is lucky Im not a hockey player because I would:

• Put in on my head to stop the goverment from sending Thought Gathering Brain Waves.
• I would knock on Kelly Brook’s door and say, “I just won this. Lets see those tit-tays!”
• Put wheels and an engine on it and drive it around.
• I’d use it as a condom.
• I would throw it through window so I can loot during the championship celebration.
• I would sell it on Craigslist.
• I would toss it off a roof to see how high it bounces.
• I would take all of the players names off it and replace all of the names with mine.

The only thing I wouldnt do is drink from it.  Thats just nasty.

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