As a huge fan of AMC’s The Walking Dead, Im a firm believer that one of these days we have a Zombie apocalypse. It might not happen today or tomorrow, but it might happen next week or next month. Who knows, maybe thats what the whole Mayan 2012 premonition is about? Regardless, I dont want to get caught off guard and not have a plan in place for when the shit hits the fan. So I decided to put together a Zombie contingency plan. But since Im not smart enough to actually put one together I decided to let other people do all of the work for me. (I guess that does make me smart huh?) I scoured the intrawebs fr the best plans and put them all together into one master contingency plan. Feel free to comment and let me know if you have one and what you think we should do in case shit goes down.
- Jan Sport back pack full with winter coat, Kit-Kats and Twix, sleeping bag, and
- Sledge hammer
- Baseball bat (aluminum bat, wooden bat might break)
- AK47 with lots of ammo
Plan of action:
Step 1: Panic like a mother fucker! Dead corpses are walking around and they want to eat you alive.
Step 2: After you’re done with your hysterics, call all likely survivors that I would want to take with me. They have to be bad-asses. Ravens linebacker Ray Lewis, Machete, Daniel Tosh from Tosh.O and Rosie Jones. She may not be a bad-ass, but she has a great ass!
Step 3: Steal and gas up a Prius. Its gay I know, but I have to conserve the gas if I plan on driving for a long time.
Step 4: Get to a Super Target. Avoid WalMart at all cost. The people who shop there are all hicks and the hicks might not be smart enough to put some heads together. Target shoppers are more smarter.
Step 5: Gather more supplies like fishing rods, toilet tissues, beef jerky, cooking grills, shit like that.
Thats all I got. I wouldnt know what else to do after that. If you have any other plan that might work, please leave them in the comments. We can all help eachother when that dredded day comes.