I have an idea for a new reality show that will guarantee a struggling network MEGA-RATINGS!
Its called Sex With Jessica Alba.
Here’s how it would work. Twenty contestants will compete in extreme events. Such as:
- Must kill a hungry lion with his bare hands
- Must rape a pitbull
- Must watch a full episode of The View
- Must turn Ellen DeGeneres straight
- Must free fall from 500 ft. in the air and walk away
And so on…
Who ever finishes last in the event will be eliminated. They will be given a parting gift, the DVD gift box set of Honey with deleted dance scenes. All other contestants will advance to the next round. So week by week, a contestant will be eliminated until there is one person who survived. That person will then be allowed to penetrate Jessica Alba for one full minute in the position of their choice. If he can last one full minute with Jessica Alba without spitting his spooge, he will win a million dollars. Sign me up right now!
